Borderline or Bipolar?

Hey guys.

So I saw a new psychiatrist today and I thought it went very successful. I really like her and she's a lot better than some of the psychiatrists I have seen in the past.

She brought up some interesting points though --

She is concerned about me going on disability. She doesn't want to see me so limited at just the age of 26. She thinks I may be able to work because she thinks my symptoms sound like borderline personality disorder.

My new psychiatrist did NOT diagnose me with anything. She said I may have one or the other or possibly even both. She was just thinking out loud. No good psychiatrist would diagnose you with anything in the first visit. But she did read some symptoms to me and had me answer yes or no and I answered yes to all symptoms except one and they were for borderline personality disorder.

The two are very similar and one is often mistaken for the other.

Here is an interesting article on the differences between the two from PsychologyToday.com:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stop-walking-eggshells/201003/three-ways-differentiate-bipolar-and-borderline-disorders

She told me to do some research and think about all of the information I had been given. So I am.

And -- I don't know what to think.

She told me BPD is treatable and sometimes you may even be able to live without medication (under a lot of close supervision -- and NEVER go off your medication without your doctor's consent and an action plan in place!).

It sounds nice. I mean, not that it would be without a lot of work, but a life without medication is a dream of mine.

Matt was very skeptical of all of this and voiced his concerns to me. He is also worried about my income and us surviving. Right now it's not so much of an issue (thanks to my wonderful and supportive parents), but in the future. My psychiatrist spoke of me possibly being able to learn how to work again. She said, however, work may not be a typical 9-5, 40 hour week for me. It may be more like 15 hours per week.

Hmm --

It's like there's a light at the end of the tunnel but it's just out of reach. I don't know what to think or how to feel about all of this. I'm nervous and I don't want to rush into changing my diagnosis anytime soon. And obviously it will be a good amount of time before I'm able to work/be off any medications.

But -- A light is still a light. A

And the future looks bright tonight.


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