Jumping on the bandwagon

I don't know if my loyal readers have noticed or not, but I have a bad tendency of jumping on the bandwagon (the latest trend, fad diets, whatever is new at the time) -- Who, ME?! NO WAY! (Haha!)

My therapist and I have been talking about this lately, and I'm trying to keep heading in the good direction I've been heading down, but it's so hard in today's society. We all just want the quick fix. But after being in therapy with a therapist I really respect for almost a year now, and seeing the slow, but steady progress I've made over this time -- well it just goes to show that I'm doing well, but there are no quick fixes. Good things come with time, patience, and strength to keep pushing through.

I really want to lose weight, but how could I have ever focused on that when my life -- well, let's be honest -- it was pretty much in shambles back then. (Obviously, it wasn't as bad as it could have been, but I definitely love where I'm at now compared to back then.)

My therapist's biggest concerns about my "bandwagon-ing" is that I start off so excited and so pumped up about everything, but then I have a bad day or couple of days, and it all spirals from there. The guilt sets in in my mind, the negative self talk comes back, screaming louder than ever, and everyone's telling me, "It was just a bad couple of days!" When in MY reality, the guilt of those "couple of bad days" is all-consuming.

So, how do I avoid this? -- I don't entirely know yet. I'm still learning how to not belittle, or beat myself up when I screw up, well, anything! I want the quick fix to losing weight, and feeling great about myself -- everyone does! However, as some dear friends have told me, it is best to take baby steps, and make small changes instead of trying to 180 your whole life all at once.

Speaking of baby steps -- 2 things:
1. Matt and I are babysitting our nephew today and it is SO GREAT! I love him so stinking much!
2. I took a baby step and e-mailed my friend -- she responded and it was so good to hear from her! I hope she has a great day!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Why?

Why do I let you consume my life at times and enter my mind? Maybe it's because you have wronged me worse than anyone ever has in my life. Why do I let the horrible things you say to us overwhelm me and make me feel like I could just break down and cry? Because you have not only picked a fight with me, but my husband as well. Why do I let you get away with things that I know are not okay? Because I think you are my friend, or are you? Why am I even giving any of you the time of day at this very moment?! Because sometimes the negativity in this world is overwhelming. And it overwhelms me to see people post and share and tweet and whatever such harmful and negative things. How can one see only the bad in a situation? How can one only focus on the bad one may be doing? What is the good? Where is the good? I feel so often, lately, as if I am drowning in a sea of blackness with all of your negative remarks and comments. How do you hold your head above water? I do it long enough...
Read more

The person I want to be

Have you ever looked at your reflection in the mirror and asked yourself, "how did I get here?" I'm having one of those nights tonight. I've been having a long talk with God and I feel frustrated because I just feel like I'm talking in circles and rambling on and on. It's like... Uhhh! Enough already! I'm really new with my faith and I'm extremely new at having conversations with God. (I would love to tell my coming-to-faith story, but we will save that for another day!) I've found myself in a predicament lately because I've been taking really good care of my skin, hair, nails, feet, but not really what goes into my body... the core of it all. A friend of mine and I just started a weight loss challenge, and both of us were doing great on our nutrition plans before that, but for some reason, when the challenge hit... (I can't speak for her) I froze. I panicked and felt as if I wouldn't be good enough... As if I didn't deserv...
Read more

With courage comes peace

The title says it all... I've tackled some tough issues this week, and because of my courage to handle these issues, I have found a sense of peace. After Thursday, I felt overwhelmed and anxious. I didn't want Matt to go back to work and after he left, I crashed. Granted, I was very exhausted, so that probably played a big part in it, however, I fell into the darkness. I began to shake. I began to cry. I began to fall off the precipice I had been balancing on for the past several months. I was lonely. I was broken into a thousand-piece jigsaw puzzle, and there was little to no chance I would be able to put myself back together. Matt called me and I snapped at him and hung up. I was angry at the situation, not him, but I took it out on him. It was wrong, and I realized that shortly after. I began to pour out my heart to him via text message. I told him how much I hated him being on third shift. How angry I was at how little he was making with all of the experience he has. ...
Read more