Peace and endorphins.

Yesterday was decent but today has been great! Let's begin with yesterday's events.

I passed out on Monday at 8:30pm. That is unheard of in Jill-World, unless I'm sick. But I gloriously slept until 10:39 and I loved every minute of it! My mom woke me up with a phone call that she was at my apartment (don't worry, it was planned, I was just being lazy), so I got up, got dressed and went to let her in.

My mom and I had such a nice visit yesterday morning, and she brought Chippy (my parent's Yorkshire Terrier) which was so much fun, but we had to get down to business. We had to prepare for the attorney to call me on Wednesday to fill out the social security disability application over the phone, and we had to dig into my past. And boy did we dig!

We scoured the internet, my medical records, doctor appointments, hospitalizations, and my work history to get all of the information (and then some) gathered just to be prepared for any questions that may be asked. It took a while to go through and get everything in order, and it was fairly eye-opening, especially for my mom, to see all of my doctors, visits, medications, and jobs throughout, well, a good chunk of my life.

Matt came home and we said goodbye to my mom and Chippy. Matt decided to play his computer game for a couple of hours and I went to the gym. 

Granted I did not work out for very long yesterday, but it was fairly intense for not having worked out in possibly over two months. 

Needless to say, I was feeling good about the day.

Then, it was time for Matt and I to hang out for the remainder of the night. 

Shit went down hill pretty quick. The worst part is, I can't fully remember why.

Matt and I got into a little tiff, but we made up pretty quick, but things were still a little awkward between us. He suggested we go to the hot tub to unwind and relax, so we did. Things started pretty good, but we became kind of cold towards one another toward the end of the night. 

I'm not sure, and I could be off, but I think Matt is (not unlike what I had to do) grieving our life we were living, and is kind of down about having to move in with my parents. Which, who can blame him. As an adult, you don't really feel like you are winning at life when you have no choice, but to move in with your wife's parents! 

We decided to call it at night at 8:30 and Matt quickly fell asleep, as usual (so jealous!), and I laid awake until 11:14. Enough was enough, so I decided to get up and watch a show and have some water and try to go back to bed after that. I would have liked to have fallen asleep by 10:00, but my plan worked and I was soon off in dreamland. 

Today I woke up at 9:17 and I made my breakfast shake, and prepared my paperwork for my attorney to call and fill out the application over the phone. I was feeling pretty anxious about this. I feel like I was anxious because, even though I had met her on Monday, the woman I spoke to on the phone for the preliminary questionnaire was so short with me, and I felt so uncomfortable, and really bad about myself.

She called and we began the application process. My anxieties were quickly put to rest because my attorney is very real and down to earth. She was patient, understanding, and made some jokes with me, which always helps. We were able to get the whole application filled out within and hour and finally... submitted.

Talk about a sense of overwhelming relief to have that out of the way! Don't get me wrong, there's still a lot to do and keep track of, but I'm trying to focus on one thing at a time, and that felt great!

After I got off the phone, I changed into some workout clothes and decided to keep the good times rolling with another workout. I was able to work out hard and longer... it was, in a word, AMAZING! I felt so great and so peaceful after my workout. I knew it always made me feel good, but I always forget how good it makes me feel when I don't do it for a while.

For the remainder of the day, I am going to get cleaned up, go to the office and submit our 2 month notice, fold and put away laundry, and prepare dinner (chicken, green beans, and carrots). 

Even if it's just for today, life is good.